Everyone must hit their child when they discipline. Right? Well, it is illegal for a parent, teacher, a guardian or anyone to hit a child in 47 nations and a forbidden punishment in schools in 124 countries. Yet all over the world, some people still think this punishment is necessary as long as it’s not severe and, unfortunately, it is still even encouraged. Hitting your children makes them think it’s right and OK. Parents are physically bigger and stronger than children. They are smarter because their brain and body are fully developed unlike a child’s.
When a parent tries to hit their own child to make them behave better, the parent is basically telling them that hitting someone who is weaker or smaller than you are an acceptable way to get them to do anything. Could this be why children bully smaller children or grow up to abuse their wives?Sometimes adults get frustrated easily or get stressed from work, family, relationships etc. so hitting your child who has been getting on your nerves, will get you to experience immense relief, which drives you to hit more or harder. Punishment will always turn to abuse. Once you begin to punish your child lightly, where do you stop? For an example, your child reaches your valuable things, you tap his hand so he can stop touching it. He reaches again and this time you spank his hand lightly. He reaches it again and you hit harder.
You’ve now started a cycle to always hit your child harder. The issues now are about who’s stronger, your child’s will to touch it or your punishment to not touch your valuable stuff anymore. The danger of punishment is when a child disobeys, you may feel like you have to hit harder until he’s so sore he can’t disobey anymore. Your hand becomes a fist, your folded newspaper becomes a belt, now what once was just an innocent tap becomes child abuse.
Hitting your child distracts the child from learning to resolve the conflict in a proper way because they get overwhelmed with feelings of anger and dreams of revenge, losing the opportunity to learn how to resolve it, making a punished child difficult to handle related events in the future. Even though children don’t think properly like adults, they can still sense injustice in this word. Punishing your child will create a very angry child, therefore, making them rebel and feel humiliated. There are many stereotypes about how different societies and cultures are brought up with physical punishment. It is a common stereotype that Eastern cultures abuse their children as a result of disappointment like bad grades, whilst western cultures are gentler and use other methods than physical abuse. But we don’t have to follow that negative stereotype and we should break the cycle. We are not defined by it and need to learn for all of us to be righteous and temperate towards the mistreated children. Abuse affects the bond between parents and children as we cannot feel love towards someone who hurt us.
It only gives you good behaviour from fear but not love or care. If your child grew up in a very loving caring home but was spanked once or twice, your child won’t remember any specific happy scenes in vivid detail, unlike the spanking scenes. It’s interesting how one negative memory can block out so many positive memories. Punishing your child affects you too! Once a mother cried, after spanking her child, “I won the battle.
But lost the war”. This suggests that she got her child to do whatever she wants however her child now fears her; she has now lost her child.