I’m addicted. I say it’s not a problem but I need it. Just one song or two then I’ll stop, but  I need it, I need it more than life itself. I need music, to play it, to sing it, or even just listen to it.

It is my drug. From the first time I picked up an instrument I became addicted.        I’ll constantly wake my family by playing the piano early in the morning, or make my parents angry because it’s “too late” to be playing the saxophone. But I don’t understand why people wouldn’t want to hear music any time of the day. I cannot go a whole day without letting my inner music out. Whether I’m humming or singing or playing an instrument.

I’m not just addicted to one kind of music; I couldn’t imagine limiting myself like that. Choosing just one kind of music would be worse than choosing one food to eat for the rest of my life or a single show to watch forever. No, I couldn’t do that. Each style of music unlocks the cage around me, allowing me to soar and experience everything and to change the hearts of all through just sound. Playing orchestral music, for example, I become a sharpshooter.

Waiting, I hide behind rows of string players, ready to jump out, shocking the audience with sharp staccato notes. I hold up the band on my shoulders and give us all the ability to fly connecting myself to the audience to create something amazing.On the other hand, small jazz ensembles are like a conversation. A question is asked, an answer given, then more is added on. Everyone has their say, everyone.

But jazz music doesn’t just stop there. Jazz musicians know that music isn’t little dots on a piece of paper, but a feeling that makes you want to soar, to search, and to find. These emotions fuel the songs, but the emotions of the musicians aren’t the only ones taken into account, but the feelings of the audience. A link is made between the band and the people watching and listening. We explore their emotions and their thoughts and we give them what we want, what they need. We create a conversation so deep and meaningful, yet, only so to us.

Music like this makes bubble with energy as emotions mix with all the emotions around me.        Through music I have learned the most important lesson of my life. never limit yourself. Whether it’s special effects makeup, athletics, or the sciences, anything that tugs at my attention even slightly, I dive into it. I jump in with a splash, taking in the knowledge as if it were oxygen and I need to breathe. Music has taught me how amazing everything can be.

I’m the soloist and all I have to do is play the song. First, the beginning, reading books of every genre. Next, the rising action, learning how to create anything from just basic chemical elements, learning how to dance, or how to create creatures out of people’s faces with just makeup. However, unlike a song, there is no end. You may ask why I left out the climax and I’ll tell you why. While songs and books and movies all have a climax, and I’m sure my life will as well, I have not reached that point so for now everything will keep rising as I learn and dive into new and exciting things, not knowing where it’ll take me but knowing I’ll enjoy the journey.

Music is everything. Everything I am is because of music. From the patience I gained from endless hours of practice, to the the flexibility I gained from being able to play any style of music, or the fearlessness I have gained from countless solos and auditions.

I am an addict, and music is my drug.

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I'm Colleen!

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